Today’s piece is really really close to my heart…basically it is something that i felt very deeply very recently…you know one of those moments, incidents that leave you with a warm smile that stays for a while on your face and then linger over on your heart and dreams for a long long time…all you have to do is close your eyes and that smile will flash on your face and that very feeling will capture your heart again…are’t these things a real treasure that we earn with time…So here one beautiful gem (latest addition) from my treasure box called ‘Life’.
School friends…i don’t know how many of you will agree with me but i believe that if we happen to rewind our individual movies,the best moments would be found in school with our school friends..because of obvious ,reasons…the innocence selflessness,madness,unconditional love,unshakable friendships…All of these feelings make that part of our lives shine brightly like a pole star on a dark night.
Although these memories are so warm and sweet but somehow as we grow those connections go weak…when life happens to us we tend to emerge all are senses in getting things right,getting it fast, getting it faster than others and getting more and some more…These feelings of being ahead from all, being loved the most, being admired…all these (necessary) feelings ,change us as person somewhere. Some of us do realize that we have changed or are changing and then there are some of us who are really blessed and live under the bliss of ignorance.
Anyways, my point here is not about these bigger questions of life…what i wanna ask you guys is…if someone will ask you to jot down your inner most feelings, the bare truth of how you felt after a school/college re-union…what it be. M sure we all lace those feelings up with how nice we felt when met with our old friends…but tell me honestly have you never got that feeling of comparing yourself with each one in the group or were you not compared with someone else in the group directly or indirectly… Well, if the answer is yes, then i guess we all fall in the majority of being normal crowed of this world.
I had one such re-union very recently, we all met almost after 10 years and with my past experience of such re-unions i was somewhere prepared that once the whole drama of meeting the close friends and feeling great about it will be over, while on our way back, each of us would be in deep process of assessing each other’s current life situation and feeling good/bad/worst about themselves.
So, this time round when we all met, something told me to take a risk , anyways i knew post this gathering mostly i am going to feel miserable, as m the only one in the lot who is not married and not even seeing anyone ( in my country, this still is a priority for a woman and has higher brownie point attraction power than following your passion and being successful in what you love to do ;)) So, i thought i am anyways going to be at the losing end of this gathering so might as well try something, which deep down in my heart i always wanted to do but could never..thanks to my fears of being accepted and loved and many many more such fears.
So when we met, i let down all my guards, i talked about my real and honest feelings about myself and my life at this juncture. My achievements, my fears, my dilemmas, where exactly i would like to go in life but what are my shortcomings in reaching there…just an honest account of current life situation… I never expected that this risk of mine will pay off such beautiful returns… First of all, while opening up my feelings with my childhood buddies i honestly realized that i have achieved a lot in my life and for the first time i felt genuinely happy and proud of shaping my life the way i have…of course it’s not that i have not made mistakes or got whatever i ever wanted but even with all those mistakes of mine, all those terrible times, all those rash decisions, all those unfairness by the creator i still was quite better off….And this feeling made me feel relived and relaxed…mostly an elusive feeling in today’s time.
Now the bigger reward of that small risk was, as if everyone in that group was waiting for someone to make that first move of being honest and childlike exactly how we used to be…to my surprise they all had their own battles to fight, their own fears to overcome, their own embarrassments and their own achievements….And we all wanted to share all of those emotions with each other and sit bare with our feeling in front of each other….Coz that’s how we have loved each other and enjoyed each others company as children, where what we felt, we shared. But now when we grow up, the urgent need of showing off the best of us, snatches away the most natural joys of sharing and lending a loving ear to our close friends.
That re-union gave all of us an opportunity to look at each other and on to individual selves without the make up of lies or manipulated truths, without the fine silhouettes of achievements and success, without the exquisite cuts of judging…and by leaving all these fancy feelings behind when we met each other in our bare naked forms, we realized that we missed each other all the way and this re-union has opened up a new chapter in each of our lives which m sure is going to be one of the most treasured chapter in my book of life 🙂