Falling in Love


I had no plans of writing my blog today…but something happened that made me write this…
So i am in office, this week is a lighter week for me in terms of work, so since yesterday i am planning to write a blog post….So,this morning presenting me with a topic that i feel very strongly about and i thought why not jot my thoughts down…
So, though its about all of us but it started off with a normal conversation with one of my collugues in the morning. She is a bright,ambitious,cheerful girl in her late 20s. Good at her work and loves to talk πŸ™‚ But today i got to see another side of her and that made me write on this topic.This otherwise chirpy,cheerful girl has so many things going wrong in her life and she was feeling very low. While listening to her, i drifted to my earlier self,the way i was couple of years back and i could so totally relate to her.
What i went through and what she is going through and a lot of us experience at some stage in our life is that phase where we start questioning our existence. A phase where you are doing a lot to keep everyone happy around you, you want to do things to keep your parents happy, you are doing things to keep your girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse happy, things to keep your siblings,your friends,your colleagues…basically everyone happy. But why do we stretch ourselves to keep others happy…because somewhere we want to be loved and accepted by them, we want to feel loved, we want to feel wanted and we do all the pleasing, all the stretching to get that validation in other’s eyes…

But have you ever wondered why do we need this acceptance and this validation…That acceptance that we are searching out for in other’s eyes is actually the acceptance that we seek from ourselves. Have you ever observed how harshly we judge our own selves, we always feel we are lacking in something or the other, we feel no matter how much we do but its always less for other people…why do we feel like that…
The reason is self acceptance….since our childhood, we are trained in taking care of other people’s needs and wants …which is a very good practice and habit but we as a society fail to talk about the other half of the same sentence.. While loving and caring for other people is nice but it is equally (if not more) important to accept and love your own-self. And if you happen to be a girl, Β that too in a country like India…then even the occurrence of Β this thought to take care of oneself will bring guilt pangs to you….

If i myself would not love me, would Β not like myself then how would anyone else would do and even if they would love me i would never be able to receive their love totally and completely since i would think at the back of my head that i am not worthy enough of their love hence i will start looking for validation of myself in other’s eyes and actions.

So no matter how far fetched this idea seems, but it is a good idea to start exploring oneself every day and then start falling in love with that person. Spend some time looking into the mirror and for a change just over look those flaws that always catch your eye and start to look for things that you like in your body, i can promise you, at the end of this exercise you will be surprised to know that how come you never noticed such lovely things earlier in your own body.

We always feel that we are being judges by others all the time but tell me how much time in a day do you spend thinking about others and their flaws… itΒ will not be more than an hour Β or two a day that your mind will wander on other people’s issues, most of the time you are busy judging your own self, you judge yourself with the eyes of others and then panic what they would be thinking…but the fact is others are also busy judging themselves, they also have their hands full while dealing with their own shit….So if you really look at it…its only us who are most harsh onto ourselves,others do not have that much of time….

So lets just take a pause and for a change, lets talk to ourselves about ourselves with love, for a change lets think what good qualities we have, for a change lets thank our own selves for being strong for being strange for being a super human for handling multiple things so well and lets for a change not look at that one mistake, that one slip of the tongue,that one quick reaction…Let’s for a change celebrate and love ourselves for being awesome…

Lets love ourselves so much that the validation from others will become an icing on the cake and will not remain a necessity to sustain day to day life…..And anyways don’t we all love the people who are in love πŸ™‚ So lets be in love with ourselves always,lets celebrate our existence and let others join the party as and when they do…because love is infectious sooner or later they all are going to celebrate you with you… till then lets have a rocking party!!!!



6 thoughts on “Falling in Love

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